Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

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Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? Because he's dead.

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops.

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Oh, well if you want, I would like for you to tell her that I wish her good health, suddenly it sounds like I am speaking with spider man here, so you could balance on the top of a tower like a ninja and stuff?

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Knock knock Who's there Fookie Fookie Who? Fook you too

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Your mother is so fat she sometimes eats a normal sized portion of food and does not feel satisfied

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Christmas presents.

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yo mama is so fat she has more body mass than a skinny person

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I was watching this movie..... its over now.

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How did the man die? A gorilla raped him

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Jimmy can't drive the tractor. Why can't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he's a patato

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Two peanuts walk down the street. One was a salted.

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I love bacon therefor I love people who eat bacon execpt people who eat my bacon then I hate people who eat bacon

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what goes boo a sock

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Your momma so fat that she went to the doctor and he told he to cut down on the junk food because she weighs more than the average human being

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When life hands you lemons...you should probably get yourself checked out because life is an abstract idea...

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Why did the boy die while brushing his teeth? The toothbrush wasn't water-proof.

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Gay marriage is freaking gay.

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An asian and white guy walk into a bar, the white man says to the asian "Do I know you from somewhere?" The asian says. "Yes, I used to go to college with you." The white man remebers him, and they catch up on life.

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A priest, a Muslim and a Rabbi sit next to each other on a plane they say nothing to each other during the flight and reach their destinations safely.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Why did the bunny cross the road? Because it waited until a car was driving by and then got run over.

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Why did the little girls ice cream melt? Because she was on fire.

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What did the mother say when her sons asked for a can of pop? No you have diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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