how do you break up with someone lightly and not hurt their feeling I dont want to hurt your feeling but i hate you

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What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheelchair

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken just lost his job and has entered into a deep depression. He was going to commit suicide at the local KFC, but as he walked into the KFC, he saw a beautiful woman. They lived a full and happy life together until the chicken died of old age. Turns out the woman was blind, and partially deaf.

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there is nothing better than waking up to realise that your being hugged by your partner unless that partner is not home

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What has 156 bras and 927 pairs of underwear? Someone without a washing machine.

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greetings ZOE. WHAAA BANNANNAS ROCK MAH WORLD. WHY DID THE TRAIN CRASH? ....BECAUSE THE CONDUCTOR WAS A PIECE OF CHEESE! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA. WELL LOVE YA CHICAS. PEACE AND BLESSINZ. SALUTATIONS, isabel.

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Why couldn't the Nativity have taken place in France? The winters are not warm enough to sleep in an animal cave without getting hypothermia, and there was no census taking place at the time.

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God made Coke God made Pepsi God made me, Oh so sexy

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Yo momma soo fat, she got diabetes and died

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what do you call obama a dumbass

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When life hands you melons it means you're dyslexic.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most rhymes rhyme But this one doesnt

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what do u call a 50 yr old man at disneyland a rapist

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What's the different between a white guy and a black guy? The white guy makes his money, and the black guy steels the white guys money.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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What did the flower say to the flowerpot? Nice weather we're having

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An orthodox rabbi, a Methodist preacher and a Muslim Cleric walk into a bar and blow that month's tithings on video slots.

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What did the black do when a man robbed his house? He called 911

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A teenager decides to stay home instead of go to college. His parents are fine with his choice since he is mentally ill.

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What did the Dildo say to the banana? Nothing, unless you're high on acid.

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Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he was late for a meeting

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hi i'm a dick, i mean mitt romney

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Q. What is the fastest animal in the world? A. An Ethiopian chicken.

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your period is red your waffle is blue find a way to fix it or no sex for you!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops