What is the same about a Duck and a Pickle? Neither of them can ride a bike.

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how long is a chinese name. how long. yup.

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Why do cats have nine lives? Because they don't have ten.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she was born with no arms and is not loved.

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How many alzheimers patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side

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Q: What would George Washinton do if he was alive today? A: Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Totsie Roll totsie pop? Altough many tests have been done, there still isn't a certain number. There are many variables involved with this question.

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a disabled man takes a walk in a park

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Robin, get in the car!

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knock knock... ...no answer

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A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

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a boy jumps off a building why? because he's afraid of heights

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A cow walks down the stairs. Not really. They are incapable of walking down stairs. It actually died on the roof.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it felt like it!

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why does clive keep getting crunk? because no girl satisfies him as much as geros

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Q: whats good about having sex with 18 year olds? A: there's 18 of them.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the only way to get across

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Justin Bieber

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A blind man walks into a bar. He had a few drinks then went home.

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Roses are red Violets are blue i have a gun get in the van

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Whats black and runs really fast? Usain Bolt

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find the o 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duh its up top

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How many dead babies can you fit in a child's swimming pool? 9 (Trust me, you won't be able to squeeze the tenth one in there.)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops