Knock Knock Go Away

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Two peanuts walk down the street. One was a salted.

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he needed to go to work to help pay for his dying daughter's cancer treatment

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stephen hawking walks into a bar...

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it Biting into a baby and finding a worm in it

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Q: Where was Moses when the lights went out. A: In the dark.

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What's worse than eating poop for your whole life? Nothing really, you've got serious problems if you have another option...

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A blond, burnette, and red head walk into a bar. They sit together and enjoy a few drinks while catching up on eachother's lives.

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Three men walked into a bar. Despite the fact that the bar was not an oblong piece of solid material as many would assume, the men entered through the tavern door simultaneously and found it most uncomfortable and awkward to be squished up against each other for several moments.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Dropping your biscuit in your cup of tea.

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What do you do with a leg less dog? Take him for a drag.

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if a sentence contains the words "Chuck Norris" it still has to end up with a period otherwise it is bad grammar and is looked down upon by American society.

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On her day off, a fully clothed stripper walks into a bar she's never been to before. The regulars turn their heads to see who has just walked in, then turn back to their own conversations.

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theres a mexican, an asian, and an american in a plane, they're about to crash, so they all have to throw out something they have a lot of in their country. The Mexican throws out beans, and says "I have to many of these in my country." The Asian throws out rice and says "i have to many of these in my country." The American throws out the Mexican and says "I have to many of these in my country."

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three people come to a serial killers house. one was annoying one was immature and one was stupid he would put them all in the same boat. then he towed it into shark infested waters, sunk it and watched them speak their mind. the annoying one said "nah nah nuh boo boo you cant eat me!" the immature one said "im gonna ride one!" and the stupid one said "could you please tell your sharks to stop eating my leg? i need it to swim away from these sharks that are eating my leg." moral of the story: dont go to serial killers homes. they will most likely kill you.

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How's the weather? Good.

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What is it... Michael J Fox has a small one, modonna doesnt have one, Arnold Shwatznegger has a long one, the pope doesn't use his, and bill clinton uses his a lot. A last name

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What do you do when a bomb is exploding 2 inches away from you? You die.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house No Oh... well he hasn't either

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An atmosphere goes into one bar. Which is pretty normal since it is roughly the regular value of the atmospheric pressure on Earth at sea level

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Your momma is such a slut, that she has unprotected sexual intercouse several times throughout any given day, with many different men.

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A gay man walks into McDonald's. McDonald's serves people of all sexualities.

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Even dyslexic people attend church and pray to Dog.

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Today i saw 2 midgets walking.........now there hanging together.....in a tree.....by there necks,,,,...............I f***n hate midgets

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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