Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

what do you call a man with a mop? a janitor.

What looks like poop and smells like cheese??

What's funnier than the Holocaust? Everything, because the Holocaust was a dark time. poop in the buttcheeks

Why was the mexican dead? Because he overdosed on Methamphetamine.

how many Alzheimer's patients does it take ti screw in a lightbulb? to get to the other side

What is the punchline of this joke? There isn't one.

Q: How many cows does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Infinite, cows do not have thumbs, in fact, they have hooves. This disables them from holding any large objects without the use of their mouthes.

What's worse then burning in hell for eternity? Well, a lot considering hell is a made-up place.

What Do you Call Cheese that's not yours (nacho cheese?) *interrupt them violently and stare with crazy eyes!* STOLEN! I was gonna make quesadillas, now no quesadillas for anyone!

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was tomato...

How did the little boy break his arm? He was trampleed by elephants.

Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

Why did the man push open the door? The sign said PUSH.

Why did the chicken walk into Mordor? It didn't. One does not simply walk into Mordor.

What's green, red, and goes fifty miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

A hayride would be fun.

why didn't the dog run after the ball? he was blind.

In Soviet Russia its very cold

Rebecca Black's new album.

Why do we have a black president? Because the populace voted and thought him to be an overall better candidate than John McCain.

Where do you find your quadriplegic dog? Right where you left it.

I'm funny.

What looks like dirt, smells like dirt, but isn't dirt? Fake dirt!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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