whats worse than getting beaten up by a bully? realizing your fly was down the whole time and getting beaten up by a bully

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What do you call a white man circled by 11 black men? D12

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what is white and red all over? a ginger

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Q: Who's driving? A: The cops

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How many stripes does a Zebra have? Doesn't matter millions of people died in the Holocaust

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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One day a girl comes home crying to her father. Father, Father! She says, a boy i met touched my shoulder! Like this? Her father says and touches her shoulder. Yes just like that, a bad part was that he kissed me on my lips! Like this? her father says and kisses her on the lips. Yes just like that but the WORST thing was he stuck his you know what into my you know where. Like this? Her father says as he sticks his you know what into her you know where. Yes just like that father but he had AIDS! ......( Awkward silence)..... oh shit.

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Hey hey what did the bald man say to brian moccia? lOL!

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Q:: when artificial intelligence takes over the planet, what will become of anti-joke.com? A:: idk, but my cousin's girlfriend and I will get naked together and she will get on top of me and tell me I'm awesome and that my d*ck feels really good inside her. you see by the time AI takes over, the means to create virtual reality experiences will be greatly enhanced.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead.

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What did Elvis say when he lost his voice? Nothing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. 'Who's there.' The chicken.

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Why did the chicken walk into Mordor? It didn't. One does not simply walk into Mordor.

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What happened to the power lifter that tried to deadlift 920 lbs while wearing nothing but his briefs? he succeeded because he is trained power lifter.

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Whats Red and smells like Blue Paint? Red Paint.

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A hayride would be fun.

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A man and his wife are walking home from a lovely evening at the movies when suddenly a masked man jumps from the bushes demanding a pad and pen, his mother just got a new phone number and he suffers from short term memory loss.

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equality for women

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Did you hear about the fetus who met a clothes hanger? I doubt very much that you did.

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Q. Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone? A. He got attacked by a dog.

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What did the blonde say to the priest? Probably something stupid due to the fact that she's blonde.

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How do you occupy a blonde for a day ? You put her in a round room and tell her to sit in a corner. ... That or you strap a bomb to her, give her a list of twelve billion things to do, and tell her the bomb will explode if she doesn't do everything on the list.

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How do you piss off a lion? You repeatedly poke it with a stick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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