What do you get when you cross a squirrel and a horse? Each animal has a different number of genetic faults therefore such a process would be impossible.

A boy and his dad are in bed and his dad is telling him a story. And the cow told the farmer to get out of the bar. Now, what did the farmer say? Holy shit a talking cow!

What is mary short for? Mary had an accident with a semi-truck and had to get both of her legs amputated.

Pants and God shorts: God: Jews ur my people nao! Jews: Yay we are Gods chosen people! Riches and gRape awaits us! World domination next! God: Well, not quite what I meant but, err... Close enough? Jews: YAY! Moral: So much for "the chosen ones" :(

cake cake and no cake, your life just ended

Knock Knock! Who's there? Steven. Steven who? Steven your neighbor, may I please come in?

Why did Steve Jobs step down as CEO of Apple? Because he died.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

what did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware river? Get in the boat.

What happened when the man went to the bar? He got drunk, drove home injuring a young teen mother, brutally assaulted his wife to the point of death. He's in prison serving 3 life sentences.

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A.Because that's where it wanted to go.

Did you hear about the three Arabs that hijacked a plane? They drove it into the Pentagon.

What do you call a person with no arms or legs rolling around in leaves? I don't know that seems like a highly improbable situation

A hobo said to another hobo "Im homeless"

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust.....

Roses are red Violets are Blue Let's just screw

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the hospital because his wife has multiple STD's

Stick figure says to the artist "Can't you make it any bigger?" Artist:"No, I ran out of lead?"

How many babies can fit in a dumpster? Let's not find out...

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

What is lil Wayne's real name? Dwayne micheal carter jr.

what do you get when you cross a dinosaur and a spaceship? a dinosaur spaceship

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 had paranoia.

what's the difference between northerners and southerners? southerners live to the south of birmingham, and they don,t stink of urine.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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