What kind of gun cant shoot bullets Hand guns

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: I didn't get to ask. He got hit by a car.

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What's 18 inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

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What do u call a matthew vasquez with a guitar, a one man mariachi band... cuz he is mexican

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What blew the baby's mind? Daddy's knuckles.

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Did you hear the one about the man who fell asleep on the job? He woke up.

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What's worse than Twilight? New Moon. What's worse than New Moon? Eclipse. What's worse than Eclipse? Breaking Dawn. What's worse than Breaking Dawn? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Breaking Dawn Part 2.

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If life throws you cars, you are probably on LSD.

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Why was Helen Keller deaf, blind, and a woman? She was a bad driver.

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What did Jimmy do on his 8th birthday? Turn 8.

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Knock Knock Who's There? Peyton Peyton who? Peyton Manning

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours Stolen propety....

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Me: Mike Mike: Yeah Me: The more you breath the more pissed off im getting.

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Hickory dickory dock. Two mice ran up the clock. The clock struck one; The other escaped with minor injuries.

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How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

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Knock knock. Who's there? IRS. Youre being audited, Sir.

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10 Mexicans are in a car. Who is driving? 1 of the Mexicans.

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Why couldn't the Jeffersons adopt a black baby? Their fireplace was empty.

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Q. How do you punish Helen Keller? A. Rearrange the furniture in her room

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Roses are red. Violates' are blue. Hitler is my homy.

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A man was standing out in the rain and calls out to god saying "smite me god, SMITE ME NOW" and the man was arrested and booked cause a near by neighbor reported on the disturbance. he is now facing charges of disturbing the peace.

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Knock Knock WHO'S THERE?????!!! y u mad? u have been knocking at the doors for 5 hours now, mom

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Why did moral man lose his superpowers? Because he read the pointless superpowers section and realized its pointless... Moral: yeah this is my power... :(

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What did the fork say to the spoon? To get to the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops