What do you call a belt made of watches? A waist of time

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How do you starve a Somalian? Too late.

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Little Jimmy's mommy loved to see the smile on her only son's face as he ate her homemade cookies. Due to lack of medical knowledge at the time, Little Jimmy contracted diabetes and died before he turned 30. Unmarried and childless, he was diligently working on his doctorate thesis on Astrophysics. His death marked the end of his family line.

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So you have been really stressed lately huh?

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What do you call a dead man walking? Someone on death row.

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There was a irishmen in his house. He was thirsty. so he drank some water

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Why are birds purple? because it fits the sky why are bats purple? bats aren't purple

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Why Lilly fell out of a cradle ? She had no arms.

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I told my doctor I’m the first man on the face of the earth to suffer from morning sickness. He promptly corrected my mistake; my excessive vomiting is actually caused by chemo.

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What do an eagle and a mole have in common? They both fly, except for the mole.

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what did the iPhone say to the other iPhone. we should not worry about that because iPhones are mute

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A Muslim walked into a bar. He didn't drink anything

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Once upon a time there was a king who had a daughter. She eventually grew up and contracted aids got run over by a bus and shit her pants..

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What do you call an African American woman with Tourettes? This question cannot be answered correctly. The African American woman was misdiagnosed. She is really a crack whore.

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Why couldn't the little kid get to sleep? His dog was on fire

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why was the boy crying? cause an elephant tusked him up the ass

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Why did Billy fail his math quiz? Because he's stupid.

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Rivals? Someone from the past? Erron, who is "WE"! Tell me now!

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I had an amnesia joke But it was written down on a slip of paper because someone else wrote it down. Let me just take it out & read it to you

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Why does Garrett have a small penis? He is not old enough to buy extenze.

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Why did the witch ride her broom? Because the vaccum was to heavy...

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A jew walks into a bar and asked for 5 shots the bartender replies to him "did you and your wife have a fight" "yeah now shes atheist"

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the awkward moment when you kill everyone in school and blame it on the fat kid

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What's worse than scraping your knee? Getting a needle shoved into your penis and the needle hitting your scrotum so that you are in serious agony for hours and finding out you cannot have kids because of it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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