If 1+1=2, then you must have passed first grade arithmetic.

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An man walks into a bar and then proceeds to purchase an alcoholic drink.

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An asian man, a black man, and a white man walk into a bar. All three of them order a scotch, coincidentally this is their favorite beverage.

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Yo mama so fat because it's in her genes.

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why did the baby fall out of the tree? the monkey dropped it. why did the monkey drop the baby? it was dead.

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what did the robot say to the black guy? I'LL BE BACK

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In Soviet Russia, you wouldn't have a likely chance of surviving because of Stalin's mass paranoia and total neglect for his fellow man.

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Why does a black man have a bicycle? He bought it with his own money.

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knock knock who's there? penis in penis in who? penis in you

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why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was taped to the first one why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? it didn't

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George Bush told Jared Fogle that he did 9/11. Jared Fogle replied "I did 9 11 year olds"

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the top 6 dictators who have died this year Moammar Gadhafi Kim Jong IL Osama bin ladden Saddam Husein Steve jobs Internet Explorer

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Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? Who me? Couldn't be.

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WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS ROAD?!!! cause he was silly

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A Mexican, a Chinese man, and a cowboy are on a plane. The plane is crashing, and they need to get rid of anything to make the plane lighter so thet can glide to safety. The cowboy throws out all of his boots and says we have to many of these. Then the Mexican throws out all of his taco shells and says we have to many of these. Then the Chinese man throws out the Mexican and says we have to many of these.(:

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Why did the rooster cross the road? Because he wanted to prove he wasn't a chicken.

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Knock knock Whos there An axe murderer oh sweet come on in.... dinners on the stove and i am here all alone

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I know there are, its not the illuminati, its not reptilian shapeshifters, nor Gods politicians nor the human condition. Its society today as it stands, they did not have the right to attack us, but if we had surpassed them, they would have lost all power, they are the relics of the past, and no matter how many of them stand, they do not grow, and what does not grow, stagnates until it finally dies. Lose hope in people most all you want, but not in the few that truly believe in you for all the good reasons in the world, perhaps we are idealists, or maybe we know that with you by our side, what we see as ideals, is something you can make come true.

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A boy walks home from school. On his way home some bullies stole his kite. When the boy got home he was greeted by a police officer that told him that his parents had been killed. The boy started crying and the Police officer said " whats wrong?". The boy replied " some bullies stole my kite".

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas A bike.

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What do you get when you cross a celebrity with drugs? A highly probable circumstance.

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Jeff comes home from a long day at work. As a result he is very tired. So, he decides to go to bed.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your doctor, You've been diagnosed with venereal disease.

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jeffrey: Do you know what happened on the 5th of november? gerald: No jeffrey: I cant remember

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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