Say the line below all very fast to get sudden strange sensation... Magic-ish. I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... ...BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK! Done? Now sit Down, have a little treat Good boy/girl! :Look well at the sun, the jagged Blackness will consume all, Your little star forever but a ever fading memory.

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Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

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If life hands you lemons you're probably a hippy because you know someone named 'life'

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven had a huge ass mole

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I met a muslim girl the other day Shes the bomb

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i tell you whats funny......... what? a fat sudanese man

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What did the Dad say when his daughter murdered everyone Tea you're grounded

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Why did the little boy throw a clock out of the window? Because he wanted to break it.

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What did the hammer say to the screwdriver? You're a tool

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What did the mother say when her sons asked for a can of pop? No you have diabetes.

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what's yellow and hovers? a yellow hovercraft.

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Why didn't bob like night clubs? He was epileptic

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What made Chuck Norris cry? Stubbing his toe

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What did the bartender say to the upset horse? GET OUT OF MY BAR!!!

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was in the oven because the farmer was cooking it for dinner.

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What do call a someone with no arms, legs, and has an eye patch? Names

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Why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? Because bungee jumping is a great activity to relieve stress.

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Two little boys are talking to each other: - My dad's dick is soo biig! - Eh, my dad's dick is small but it still hurts...

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whats black and hangs from my tree a plum

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

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What's brown and smells like shit? An oddly shaped birthmark on a dirty homeless man

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Don't make jokes about the Holocaust. My grandfather died in the Holocaust. He fell off a watchtower.

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Customer Service "May I help you?" "Yes."

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Did you hear about the new brand of shovel? Yeah, it's pretty groundbreaking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops