What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer...and the other is a watermelon.

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Did you here about the 2 guys who wanted to go to Paris? They didnt go!

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Why do birds fly South in the winter? Warmer, better food sources and therefore greater chance of survival.

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what's the difference between a jew and a pizza? a jew is a member of a religion called Judaism, they're generally tall and have curly hair, however not in all situations is this true. They celebrate Chanukah and passover and many other holidays. Pizza is an italian dish, it's round, has red sauce and cheese on it and is pretty tasty.

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What do you get when you cross an Indian and a duck? An Indian duck.

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Why did the weird, creepy old man in the beat up van give ice cream to the little girl? Because his company went bankrupt and as part of a court order, he was thereby forced to give away the remaining contents of his inventory to those who seeked it.

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Why did the asian driver crash his car? Because he was driving while intoxicated.

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I once went to a chiropractor. She was so awful looking. You know those weird spiky fish with the lightbulb hanging off it's head? .....I saw one in a documentary once.

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The awkward moment when you don't know whether to like or dislike this because you think I want like so you are gonna dislike but what If I want dislikes, but what if I want likes, you are confused Antijokeception....

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What's hard and orange on the outside, and squidgy in the middle? A tanned man's head

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Q: The president is driving down the road, when the wheels of his boat fall off. How many ping pong balls does it take to fill the Empire State Building? A: False. Vests don't have sleeves.

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What did the serial killer eat for breakfast? You.

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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Simba was moving slow,so I told him to MUFASA!!!

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How did the deaf girl die? I beeped but she didnt hear me

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What do you say to a black couple that just got married? Congratulations

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What is yellow and smells like a flower? A yellow flower :)

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Justin Bieber.

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Why did the girl stop running? Because she is in a wheelchair and will never walk again

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Yo mama so short, she developed a debilitating neck problem from having to look up at people when talking to them.

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Why didn't Lucas want to go down the slide? He was scared.

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vote this down and i will DOX you

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Orchids are white, Sunflowers are yellow

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Why was the boy put on his socks? So he wouldn't get blisters.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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