What do you call a white guy surrounded by 10 black guys? A friendly individual who cares nothing about racial differences and instead judges people based on character.

What is the difference between a painting and Jesus? It only takes one nail to put up a painting

What do Abraham Lincoln and George Washington have in common? They both had beards, except for Washington.

Boy 1: What comes after L? Boy 2: Elephant, elbow, elk, elementary, Elliot, Elder Scrolls? Boy 1: No. Boy 2: What is the answer? Boy 1: M

Q: How many times did the chicken cross the road? A: One and a half.

Knock knock Who's there Bill Bill who? Bill Thompson

Why couldn't the black man get his lawnmower to start? He was too poor to own a home =)

Why didn't George Washington get his drivers license? Cars were yet to be invented.

Why didn't the boy get his mom anything for her birthday? He was killed by a drunk driver years ago

What do you call 100 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A weird kind of genocide.

Q:What do you call an insecure person A:Somebody who is likely to commit suicide

A dog walked into a bar. He was a trained seeing-eye dog leading a man who had been blind since a tragic industrial accident a year before.

What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

What does china and an 80 year old body builder have in common? They're both asian. I forgot to mention that the body builder is japanese.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Who are you?

Ashton Kutcher meets a fine cougar at a bar and the cougar fatally wounded his throat.

What would Jesus do? Something that would in getting nailed to a piece of wood.

Leading a hike.. Kid falls off a cliff and dies. Who cleans him up? Bear.

69

Q.If I have four apples and billy has 4 oranges, how many pancakes will fit on the roof. A. 3 because aliens like purple hats.

Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

What's worse than having a spiked club shoved up your butthole? Not much.

Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree?Cause it was stapled to the cat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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