Q.-What's the difference between broccoli and a dead moose? A.-Yes.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

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What did the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing

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Why did the black man walk into a bar? To order a drink.

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what was so bad about hitler? he inadvertently subjected his political officials to death by rope

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A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair.

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What do you can a stinky mexican? Whatevet his name may be. Possibly Jose

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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what did the boy with dyslexia get for his birthday? bad grades

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Person A said: Knock Knock! Person B could not answer the door as he could not hear Person A's announcement of his or her arrival.

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What do you call a man with bananas in his ears? A doctor. He is clearly mentally unstable, and probably in pain.

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A man loses his wife in a car accident He then fall into a deep depression then hangs himself.

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Why is bobsledding the coolest sport? Because this is my subjective opinion.

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Breaydn Simmons walked into a bar

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What's worth than a large pile of dead babies? Nothing, you sick freak.

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A horse, a duck, a pig, and a mus lim walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the mus lim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the mus lim that he's keeping company with a swine, and the mus lim feels offense for the poor horse.

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How did the Black man die at the KFC? Someone killed him.

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My friends a Jehovahs Witness. He got all pissed at me because he tried to tell me a knock knock joke and I ignored him.......i totally stole this joke lol.

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A: u wanna die? B: does anyone really wanna die, i mean logistically, un-less u are suicidal, why would you wanna die? A: I do wanna die. B: ur a freak and you should consider getting help person A never got help, on his way to getting help at a certified physician he got hit by a bus, his body can be found at the intersection of church ave. and flatbush. And i would say rest in piece but cars drive over him daily, and thats not to peaceful

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Lewis

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a man walks into a bar he has a few drinks and announces to his friends that hes driving home, dave (one of his friends) tells him that its a bad idea and takes his keys off of him until the next day.

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Why did the black man have sex with the white woman? Because they were married.

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Little Timmy walks up to the teacher during class and asks "Can i use the restroom?" The teacher says "I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy says "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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Roses are red, violets are blue. Your definitely a virgin, too bad your mom isn't too.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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