Why did the Zombie kill and eat a man? Because it was hungry.

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roses are red violets are blue kyle brown and pj nosaki have big balls

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Why did Polly fall off her roof? Because her dad pushed her.

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what do you call someone with one arm? Handicapped.

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What did the coin said when it got flipped ? Nothing, coins do not have sufficient requirements to be able to talk like we humans do.

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how many milkshakes does it take to bring all the boys to the yard?

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Fed-Ex, here's your new brother.

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Knock knock ? Who's there ? Ipe Ipe who ? You sick !

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How do you fall off a building... JUMP.

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whats up with the irish jokes? Honestly im not a alcoholic so all of you can go F*** yourselfs...

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Why did Joe not cross the road? Because the Pedestrian Crossing light said not to.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I left my car keys inside.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Why did little Susie Fall in the well? She had downs.

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot

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Why was the boy sad he ate a loaf of bread? Because ducks ate him alive after that.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the ocean? Dead.

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Why are black people so good at basketball? Because they work hard at it

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What did squidward do when SpongeBob asked him to be his friend on Facebook? 1.declined it 2.got a restraining order against him 3.wondered how computer generated cartoon characters could send and decline friend requests

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News of the day - David gives back 2 pounds to someone. The police, as he stole from a old nana to pay for a toothbrush

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pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooop

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why did the plant eat a banana? it was hungry

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Your moma's so fat, she has a considerable list of medical health problems, and she is very miserable.

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a T-Rex? Humans are vertebrates belonging to the Mammalia class, chiefly a member of the species Homo sapiens; dinosaurs are chiefly terrestrial, herbivorous or carnivorous reptiles from the extinct orders Saurischia and Ornithischia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops