roses are red. vilets are blue. I'm getting hungry. make me some food...bitch.

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69

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What is worse than getting stung by a wasp? Getting raped by a sexually frustrated bear.

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Once upon time the government was corrupt Jk, it always has been

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Knock Knock! Who's there? John.

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What do you call somebody who votes for Donald Trump? A voter. What do you call somebody who votes for Hillary Clinton? A voter.

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Care to fill in some of the etc etc`s for me? Its not like we are complete strangers one to another either, you and I I mean, I feel pretty secure around you.

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Q: How do you kill a goblin if the fries are next to the sushi? A: Yes. Walruses have nostrils and rubber chickens don't like microwaves!

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What happens when a black man dies in France? A funeral procession.

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What goes in dry and comes out wet Gum

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Whats the difference between a squirrel and a grape? They're both squirrels but ones a grap...

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what did the apple say to the orange? :nothing because an apple is not a human organism nor an orange therefore they can not speak....

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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Roses are red violets are blue Timmy what are doing with that gun?! Bang....

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Q. Why did the boy fall off the swing? A. He had no arms or legs. Q. What did he get for Christmas? A. A drumset Q. Knock Knock Who's there Not him

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What did the mute person tell the deaf person? Nothing. Even if sound could emit from his vocals the impaired of hearing person would still be unable to respond unless they have taken classes to read lips. The deaf person didn't take classes nor did the mute person learn sign language.

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Why are kenyans so fast? Because due to evolutionary changes, people from that area of the world have evolved to have superior muscle builds to sprint, hence giving them a natural advantage against an equally trained athlete form another part of the world with an equal skill level

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Whats white and blue and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a fridge in a denim jacket :D

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What would you say if you girlfriend got hit by a train? Trick question, trains don't go through kitchens!

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What did Britney Spears say when she got to Paris? "Oh my God, we're in France!"

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UN

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Why didn't the Orphan finish his lemonade. His legs got chopped off.

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An american, a mexican, and an asian are on a boat. The boat is sinking because it is too heavy. The people decide to throw off things that they have a lot of in their country. The asian throws rice off the boat saying, "We have plenty of rice at home." The mexican throws tacos off the boat saying, "We have plenty of tacos at home." The american throws out the mexican saying, "We have plenty of mexicans at home."

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Why is McDonalds bad for you? Because their is so much fat in all its products, and contains many calories.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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