How do you make the queen of england cry? You rape her violently.

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How do you get a girl with two jobs to drop on her knees? Through a penny on the knees

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Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a truck? No.

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What do u call a six year old boy holding a gun. illegal

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What is black and bad for your teeth? A cannon ball

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We are unhappy, unfilled because we cannot complete our dream, it is always about us, then again, is wanting the best for others being selfish?

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How many friends does it take to catch an owl? One because he was a bird catcher.

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A brown park bench was bought. After multiple years the color had faded, and the bench was no longer the same shade of brown.

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mary had a little lamb it's fleece was white as snow and everywhere that mary went it did a massive shit

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Mom says my name I reply Coming.

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What's worse than waking up with a clown in your bed? Waking up with a dead clown in your bed.

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Why couldn't the T-Rex give anyone a high five? Cuz he's dead.

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What did the bullet say to Bin-Laden? Suck it

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What's black, blue, red, green, white, purple, orange, yellow, etc.? Last I checked, a bunch of colors

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Getting shot.

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What do you call a Christmas tree with lights on it? A Christmas tree with lights on it.

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why are black people scared of chain saws? because it goes runnigganigganiggarunnigganigganigga

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Want to hear a scary story?' I was droppin a two ball and the monster walked in

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman went to the top of the Empire State building to have a penis measuring contest. The Irishman had the longest penis.

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A priest, R Kelly, and Michael Jackson walk into a bar. They proceed to molest small children.

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oh hey.

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Chicken

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Q: whats worse than finding out you failed an exam? A: finding out you where Hitler in a past life

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why did the chicken cross the road? he didnt.. that kinda shit never happens

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops