A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. His family is struggling financially and his children are severely malnourished. If he wasn't an alcoholic, he could afford healthcare for his family and move into a better neighborhood. But he's not, so they will die a long, painful death.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

kara is funny she loves her money so she buys a bunny for her honey

thumb_up thumb_down -26

whats worse than breaking your arm? getting raped by a squirel

thumb_up thumb_down -26

If there are anti jokes why are there no uncle jokes?

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the disabled kid do on friday? He fell down a flight of stairs.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A dimetrodon, a pterosaur and a chicken walk into a bar. As they enter, the bartender says "Hold it! We are not licensed to serve dinosaurs." "I am not a dinosaur," said the dimetrodon. "Neither am I," said the pterosaur. "But I am," said the chicken. So the dimetrodon and the pterosaur enjoyed a cold beer each, but the chicken had to wait outside.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

hey i just met you,but this is crazy, my name is kony and i just took your baby

thumb_up thumb_down -26

In mediavel times :A Jew rapes his mom.... He is promptly taken out of society and thrown into a lions den due to his act of imortality.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why was Michael Jackson so bad at dancing? Because he had a broken leg.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

thumb_up thumb_down -26

I met this girl and we really got along, then one night she tied me up, I thought she was getting kinky...then she ripped my face off....

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the kid poo his pants? Because he was Matt Daly

thumb_up thumb_down -26

There are two muffins sitting in an oven, one muffin says to the other; boy it's hot in here. the other other muffin doesn't reply because it's a muffin, muffins don't talk. Now consider that the first muffin was a squirrel, A TALKING SQUIRREL!

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What you do you call a gay man with no arms and legs? His name.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

The trick to making a good anti joke is having anticlimactic ending.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

MR MC CANN WHATS THE ANSWER

thumb_up thumb_down -26

roses are red violets are blue i have no money could i have some

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What did the man with one arm get for Christmas? A benchpress

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What is red and ragging? A Hemorrhoid

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What goes up and down, up and down, up and down, forever? An insult to Newtonian physics.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Dubstep = a computer with a noisy virus.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

How can you outsmart Stephen Hawking? Steal the wheels of his chair and replace them with a dolphin.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops