Why can't white kids say the "F" word? Because they'll get soap in their mouths Why can't black kids say the "F" word? Because they'll get a beating until their butts turn black and blue and they'll start crying in pain

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Its Eliza, hope you are still there, would you mind getting here sooner? This site is not safe, besides its cold here, I mean send somebody else if you got to, I might look frail but Nero taught me a thing or two, so I can honestly say that Nero taught me better than you guys just in case. Funny you say there is no code, yet add three, yeah you better expect nothing "fancy", Mr.Torture dungeon master. Honestly though I do not blame you, and if I really meant you where a psycho, I would not have agreed/asked you showed up, I am serious I need to get out of here.

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I liked your first album but I feel that it went downhill from there. There are a few good songs on your third album though.

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What did the monkey say to the lion? I'm being sexually abused by my handler, and feel so violated.

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It's probably not a good idea that your in here, any sudden movements and you could seriously injure somebody. Our beer glasses aren't ergonomically designed for your kind of species. I'm going to have to ask you to leave

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WHO LET THE GHOST OUT! BOO BOO BOO BOO BOO! Mortals: That was a bit funny...

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BLACK PEOPLE! (im black so its not racist)

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Why did the Jew pick up the dollar on the side of the road? Because he dropped it.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Whoop-dee-do.

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hi dave

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Cancer. Super Cancer.

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I'm not one to tell gay jokes So I won't

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what is the color of a burp burple

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What's the difference between a duck?

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What did the cancer patient say before they died? I am in so much pain. I love you all

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"Is this the Krusty Krab ?" I'M TIRED OF YOUR SHIT TYRONE.

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How do you know when it is a Mexican's birthday? They are walking around with "happy birthday" balloons.

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What did the man say when he realized that he was late for work? "Shit, I'm late for work."

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What did the cat say when someone pointed out that cats can't talk? Meow.

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Jack: Hey, you know what sucks? Jill: Vacuums Jack: Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense? Jill: Black holes Jack: Hey, you know what just isn't cool? Jill: Lava?

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Neil Lewis

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what happens when steven hawking walks into a bar? everyone cheers at the miracle of science.

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If you dumb fooks keep swearing we are going to get banned.

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Correctional officer asks an inmate. "Does your elevator go all the way up"? Inmate replied. I don't know we always use the stairs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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