I always used bra`s so I guess you know, nice I guess. Can you please stop it? I like know I am telling but my mind wont like accept it, and I would just like to shut off the laptop, but I want to keep chatting with you for just a bit more.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Equal rights!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What time is it? 2:47 PM.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what did Tim get for Valentimes day? nothing, no such day exists. spell check

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Think of the worst thing you know of and add dead babies

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than a broken leg? Two broken legs

thumb_up thumb_down -1

My teacher told me to so a report on women rights.....I turned in a blank sheet! ^.^

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Chris is hairy

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the difference between an orange? A bicycle because a vest doesn't have any sleeves.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what happened to the man who fell off the boat? He died!

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are black Violets are Black I'm Hellen Keller

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the man want for his birthday? Chicken dinner serves 2-3 people

thumb_up thumb_down -1

hi i'm a dick, i mean mitt romney

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Adam Fantuzzi's just jealous because he'll never be the man his mother is

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's white and can't climb a tree? A fridge

thumb_up thumb_down -1

WELL YOU ARE ALL A ROOF. So pie, my dearest Adam. Like a butthole.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

In an effort to bond, the American president and North Korean Supreme Leader place a bet on a football game. If the President was correct, the Supreme Leader would have to buy them a drink, and vice versa. The game is close but in the end the President's bet wins. He asks for the drink, but the Supreme Leader refuses. An argument breaks out, and lasts for several hours. Eventually the Supreme Leader becomes too infuriated, and leaves. So the next day, North Korea declares war on America and launches nuclear missiles towards them, millions of lives are lost, and the world descends into anarchy.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter anyway because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A sheep walks into a baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What happen when a penguin walks into a bar? That is an almost impossible occasion. Penguins first of all waddle not walk and they only live in Antarctica and zoos, therefor they will not be able to enter one unless Antarctica becomes populated.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Nero, listen, do not try to imply that you created the Iron man method, that was developed by many people over the duration of many years in the former underground society. You seem far too educated to be the savage you claim to be, if I told you that our people will do the uttermost to see if we can fix that eye of yours and succeed, will you forgive my failure and imperfections as a leader? Look at it this way, I am a leader, not a ruler, what my followers do is up to them, but if they cannot understand that they have to pay the consequences behind their actions, they have no place within the order, as for the expression "my order" it is simply what my many followers like for me to say, not because they are unwilling to take responsibility, but as a token of praise. Our articulations and means of expressing desire and such are very much the same, have you ever been part of our order?

thumb_up thumb_down -1

DON'T READ THIS!!! you suck.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock knock "Honey, could you get the door?" "I'm tired of doing everything here! Get you ass up and do it yourself!" "Well why don't you just go back to bar you whore?" "This marriage was a mistake, I'm going back to mother!" They divorced 5 months later.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops