Why did Quinn yell at his group project partner? Because he hated him.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from K.F.C

How do you put a bananna in a mini-van? Walk up to the mini-van and stick it in the backseat.

Your mom is so ignorant that she in completely unaware how the premature termination of QE2 in conjunction with a potential US credit downgrade could substantially impact her fixed income portfolios and hinder her ability to retire in the desired time frame.

Why was 7 afraid of 6, because 6 raped 5

whdid the cop say to the robber as he ran out of the bakery? I caught you bread handed

Where do cows go on the weekends? The slaughterhouse.

Why did the chicken cross the road Who the f*** let out the chicken

What is Hitler's favourite Yu-Gi-Oh card? Blue Eyes, White Dragon.

If a chicken and a half layed an egg and a half in a day and a half how many pancakes does it take to shingle a roof? -A banana has no bones

Q: whats the difference between a shoe and a ginger? A: shoes have soles.

What do you call an Ethiopian with a yeast infection? Quarter pounder with cheese.

What's John Lennon doing these days? Decomposing.

What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

800 people died last year. end of story

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, I died because I didn't have a heart.

"What's up?" "A movie about an old man who takes his house to South America by tying balloons to it, who accidentally brings along a young boy with him and they have an adventure."

What's the difference between Nelly and Common? One of them is an artist and one of them is a businessman.

I saw a woman get burned alive on the news... That woman was my mom.

Why is it bad to have 10 blond girls in a closet at the same time? The closet is a very compacted space and one of them is a claustrophobic.

Knock Knock Who's There? The I.R.S.

Q: Whats the difference between me and a ghost? A: Ghosts arnt dolphins!

A blone walks into a bank in New York City and asks the bank teller for a $5000 loan because she's going to Mexico for 2 weeks. The bank teller said he would need some security for the money. The blonde tells him her new Rolls Royce is in the parking Lot and she hands him the keys. The blonde gets the money and goes on her trip. Another employee at the bank then parks the car in the underground parking garage. He later ffinds out the blonde is a multi millionaire. When the blonde arrives home from she pays back the $5000 and $15 interest. When the bank teller asks her why she gave them a $250000 car for security or needed the $5000 loan if she was a multi millionaire, the blonde answers, "Where else can you park your car in New York City and expect it to stillbe there when you return?"

How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...