Knock Knock. Who's there *gun shot*

Why did i get some thing to eat? Because i was hungry.

what's worse than people who aren't funny? ryan vallee

Why couldn't the colorblind boy play Twister with his friends? He was a quadriplegic.

why did the Japanese father cry? because when america bombed japan in wwll it happened to kill the rest of his family

What can be said about a high school drop out who is 30, lives with his mom, and plays WoW all day? He is probably a very high level mage

why has kallum just changed clothes to speak to a counsellor because he's socially awkward and has no peers

A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

Why did the old man cross the road? Coz he was in an ambulance

What's a dead baby look like? I don't know, I don't fap with my eyes open.

What is small, slimy, and thrown in the garbage? A stillborn

Why did the black man sleep all day? He suffered from narcolepsy.

What did the raped girl get for Christmas? Pregnant.

What did the rug say to the floor? I got you covered

Fuzzy Wuzzy was bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair, and died of cancer

Q: Why is Alzheimer not funny? A: To get to the other side.

What happened when the dinosaur walked into a lake? It got wet

What is you problem!? Im retarded, what is your problem?

Knock Knock. Who's There? Look through your peephole, you lazy bastard.

how do you know if an asian gang has been to your house? 1. your computer is unplugged 2. your homework is finished 3. they are still trying to back out of the driveway

How many shots do you have to take to start feeling light-headed? Ask JFK.

Q: What did the tree say as he fell? A: Studies have shown plants in general do not have a voice box, thus making plants incapable of speaking.

two mexicans are in a car, who's driving one of the mexicans!!!

Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: Yeah, these clippers have belonged to my grandfather, father, and me. Bill: Darn, thats quite amazing, I wish I could get a pair of those, but I doubt they still make them. Sean: I'm pretty confident they don't, but you can borrow these anytime. Bill: Thanks Sean thats very generous of you. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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