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What would happen if the whole world farted at once?

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How do people from Indian Hill laugh? Like an Indian, huh, huh, huh!

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Two lifelong friends walk into the locl Bar and each order a Beer. " So how's life treating ya?" Phil replies, " Well Doug, I've got Stage Four Lung Cancer. I'm going to Die, remember?" Unfortunately, Doug doesn't remember because Doug has a Brain Tumor.

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why did your mom make food to feed the killweeds.

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Why did the girl have an abortion? Because she wanted a burger.

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What did the limp dick say to the vagina? Sorry, I'm a poof.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because I hit her with an axe.

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How many polish people does it take to change a light bulb? Just one. The polish are a civilized and prosperous country.

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What do you call a white duck? A quacker

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what's worse than the holocaust? nothing.

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It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

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There was a white kid named Tyrone.

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"It's a blimp, it's a hot air balloon!" "No wait, it's your mom."

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? rape

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what do you call a kid named kid. kid

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If you spill milk Don't cry over it..... Clean it up.

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What does a black man do when drives up to a STOP sign? Stops.

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What Do you say to an atheist after he sneezes? Bless you. Its just polite

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Why are anti jokes so funny? Because their not.

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Liverpool City Football Club

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What do Lincoln, JFK, and Barack Obama all have in common? They were all president of the United States of America and are relatively good people.

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Whats tha difference between blacktop and an airplane wing??? Well, alot. I bet you knew that.

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How is a frog similar to a corn dog? They both have really long tongues, except for the corn dog

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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