Knock knock. Who's there? Hi. Hi Who? Hi who?! Hi Ho Hi HO. Its off to work we go!! umm.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing

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What do you call 5 black guys at the bottom of the ocean? scuba divers

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why didn't the chicken cross the road?!

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You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me!

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A rooster lays an egg on top of a henhouse. Which way does the egg fall? Roosters don't lay eggs.

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What's brown and white all over? Chad butthole

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Q.what is the diffrence between a jew and a pizza A.pizzas dont scream in the oven

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How do you starve a black person? Hide his food stamps in his work boots

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A rooster lays an egg on the tip of a roof. Which side does it fall to? Roosters don't lay eggs

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So there was this cracker sitting on a bench. A pigeon picked it up and flew off. Probably ate it afterwards.

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A Mexican man walks into a bar, the bartender asks "haven't you got a damaged liver?" The Mexican replies "haven't you got a job to do?" The Mexican died 2 seconds later

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When life throws you lemons, you probably have dyslexia

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Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

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That was slightly painful. I would appreciate it if you would stop such actions in the future

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Uh Erron, you know, I do not spend most of the time before this computer or studying because I am popular nor anything, so that`s one thing, and yeah, I never done it with anybody so yeah, uhh lucky me or something.

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Why did the Jew pick up the dollar on the side of the road? Because he dropped it.

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Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

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what did the nostalgic robot barber say to all of his customers before cutting their hair? 0010101000011100101000100100100110101010100101010101010

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A white man, a black man, a Mexican man and a Chinese man were on the same bus. The didn't socialize cuz that would count as racism

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What did the kI'd with cancer get for Christmas? A coffin.

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Q: Why shouldn't you throw rocks at a black guy on a bike? A: Because he could sustain serious injury if a rock hits him in the head, not to mention it is extremely rude.

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60+8.99999999=68.99999999 soo close

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What do you call a dear with no eyes. A mutilated dear.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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