A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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Why didn't the boy cross the street? He didn't have legs

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "I have AIDS".

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*puts thumbs up on own anti-joke. Nobody needs to know....

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A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

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What’s the best part about knowing things no one else does? Nothing. I’m schizophrenic and can’t afford medication.

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What did the man say when he lost his car? Where the fuck did my car go

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an american walks out of a strip club.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. You wife was killed in an accident.

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Where's the dick??? east

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A gay man walks into a pregnant woman

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Why can't black people swim? Many of them can. It's racist to assume that.

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A wise man once said a journey of a thousand steps starts with one step. The wise man also smoked weed and starved to death in a cave.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Presents.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see monkey do. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the second monkey.

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WANNA HERE A JOKE? (no, i purposely clicked in this joke website to simply here to fulfill my demonic internet pleasures.)

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once you go Persian, there is no other alternative

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What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

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9 Cats on a boat. One Jumped off, how many left? 8.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 6 shots, "Long day?", the bartender asks. "Yeah", the man replies, then he goes home and hangs himself

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If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

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Why are a black man's eyes always bloodshot red after having sex? Pepper spray.

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Whats the difference between chris and a party. the locations

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What's the difference between and Jew and a boy scout? The boy scout returned from camp.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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