why did the monkey fall out of the tree? HE WAS DEAD STUPID IDIOT.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is Alqueida's favorite football team? The New York Jets.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's scarier than a ghost? Ur mum.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

In a galaxy far, far, away.... There were quasars, stars, and various sized meteors.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's circular and round A circle

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How did the rock cross the road? It didn't cause it's a rock.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How many people does it take to screw a light bulb? One, it's all the sex they can get.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A Muslim and 2 French people walked into a bar They start to have a nice conversation about Charlie Hebdo

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What african eat for christmas Sand.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock knock Who's there Why? Why who? Why so serious?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: What's blue, red, and circular? A: I lied about the blue, and... uh... the red and circular part too, but everything else is true. It is an ipod touch.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Comedian: Do you all wanna hear a joke? Audience: Yeah!!! Comedian: Okay! What did the bad comedian say to the audience? Audience: What?!! Comedian: Chicken butt. Thank you, you've been a great crowd. Good night!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red, Violets are dead, I climbed through your window, I'm under your bed

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's better than seeing a Detroit Lions game? Not being in Detroit.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock knock. Who's there? Blanket Blanket who? Blanket, son of deceased recording artist Michael Jackson. Ever since his father died there has been so much stress in the family that he could not handle it. He ran away and is now seeking shelter and grief council.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Two friends sit down at a table for lunch. One, in a very frustrated mood, says to the other, "You know what I don't get?" His friend immediately responds: "Sex."

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: What did the clam say to the postman? Moral: "Hey its me the worlds only talking clam! How you doing dude!"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you stop birds from building nests in your grill? You turn the grill on

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the black man eat the fried chicken? He was hungry

thumb_up thumb_down +1

You Mom is so ugly, It makes sense why you always have that look on your face!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

If the black man lives in the black house, and the yellow man lives in the yellow house, who lives in the white house? The white man. As unfortunate as it is, racism is still a very integral part of society, and the social dominance the white man holds in countries like America are not to be so quickly forgotten.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops