How long does it take to microwave a baby? I don't know, I was to busy masterbating. GBW

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What do you call a Koala bear that does not have a chin? A Koala bear.

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Why did the girl go to the hospital? Her brother dared her to jump off the second story roof of their house...

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Why did the chines were sunglasses? It was sunny.

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Your life

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Knock Knock Whos there? Your mom My mom died three years ago, please go away while i cry.

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Why did the girl fall of the swings? Because she has no arms.

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Quaint? Oh yeah? YOU ARE QUAINT! No seriously, whats that word all about.

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Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

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Why didn't the lady answer the phone? She is deaf and mute.

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A black guy and a white guy are walking down the sidewalk. As it suddenly begins to rain, what does the white guy say to the black guy? Nothing. They did not know each other.

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What do you call a black man doing his taxes? A well respected member of society

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Whats white and rubs stuff out ? An albino with a rubber.

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How many Ethiopians can you fit in a car? Five in your standard sedan

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What does it mean when you see a bunch of blacks running in one direction? That you need to be more specific.

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How many Dean Mckee's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? He doesn't know what a lightbulb's for, nevermind how to use one.

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what kind of pizzas did the twin tower executives order on 9-11? two large "planes"

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A bus full of retarded kids got broken on his way. One kid suggested to the bus driver that the problem could be with the brakes, as that kid's father was a mechanic.

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Why couldn't the girl call her boyfriend? Because she is homeless and can't afford to buy a phone.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven killed all of six's family

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your mom is so stupid she got raped

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How do you make a gorilla stop chasing you? You shoot him.

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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A Rock accidentally fed a giraffe his fetuses conceived by a box of glue from Jewish Heritage that was made from marker sharpeners that fed paper to elephants while strumming a box of tissues to wipe up the mess from a box of chocolates Forest Gump feeds on your soul while a rock accidentally feeds a giraffe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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