Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

The cow's name was Friday, But can you guess what day it died? Monday, it had a fun weekend with its family before it was brutally slaughtered.

Q:Whats rhe best part about spinning a baby round and round Stopping it with a shovel

What do you call a school bus full of black people? A school bus

Peter charas threw a masterball at a level 20 Zubat!!!!!

What happened to the man who poo'd too much? He started to eat less because his bowell movements started to cause him serious pain.

what is worse than tripping over a tree root? getting mauled by a 60 foot bear

What's worse than being single on Valentine's Day? Finding out your son has AIDS.

A horse walks into a barn.. The farmer says "why the long face?",This frightens the horse ultimately leads to the farmer getting kicked in the teeth

-how many potatoes are in a sack -5

Q: what did the grandmother give to her grandson. A: a lightbulb

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Bend Over.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the Farmer had treated the Chicken and the rest of his family with great distaste, thus angering the Chicken to the point of rebellion against the Farmer with hopes of inspiring the other abused farm animals to act likewise.

Why did the black man have a Lamborghini in his garage? Because he got good grades in school, was accepted into a nice college, and earned a medical degree, which he used to get himself a well-paying job in the medical field.

if you are reading this your wasting your time

Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

what do you call a redneck virgin? a seven year old that can run faster than her brothers.

what goes woof ? A dog.

There is a high speed pursuit when suddenly the suspect's car skids out of control and crashes into a field. Two cows witness the commotion, when one turns round to the other and says "Moo"

Kid: "Tell me about when you were young, Grandpa." Grandpa: "Oh, sonny, those were crazy times. My friends and I were out of control. We used to give each other wet-willies and funny arm. We'd play dandy-balls and legs-a-spread and penis-butt." Kid: "Sounds kind of gay, Grandpa. " Grandpa: "It was gay. Everyone was. But, back then, we were called pole-fancies. It was real, good old-fashioned "grab the nearest tree and hold on for dear life" gay, not today's fancy, featherbed, thread-count gay. People got hurt back then! Kid "That's gay." Grandpa: "Yeah, it was pretty gay "

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: b/c it was dead. Q: Why did the second monkey fall out if the tree? A: b/c it was stapled to the first one. Q: Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A: b/c he thought it was a game. Q: Why did the toaster fall out of the tree? A: The branch snapped. Q: Why did the little girl fall off of her bike? A: She was hit by three monkeys and a toaster :( MAB99

A Black Man Walks Into an Office For A Job Interview. The Meeting Goes Very And He Soon Has A Very Nice Steady Job.

"Is your fridge running?" "Yes, I believe so" "You'd better go make sure, because I put some chicken in there and it didn't seem very cold to me"

The power of Mindfuck: What if you can only walk left when you are right? And if you can walk right when you are the only one left? What is left when everything is right? Moral: Create a right world by taking the left road? YOU PIECE OF FILTH!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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