How did the blind man escape the mugger? He ran into a bus.

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what is the ??? crust^2 + Cool Whip

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How do you sink a Polish submarine? Hit it with a torpedo.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The doctor. You have aids.

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What does a Jewish woman do to keep her hands soft and her nails long Nothing at all

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Stick figure says to the artist "Can't you make it any bigger?" Artist:"No, I ran out of lead?"

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What did the Woman say to the man after he walked into the pole? That was a pole you idiot

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what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

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What is the difference between a goat? It can neither ride a bike.

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Whats worse than Justin Bieber's love life. My ass crack.

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Q: Hey, ask me if I'm a tree. ".. Are you a tree?" A: No.

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All of the people in the burning building escaped except for one what was wrong with that one person? He was a blind, could not hear and was in a wheelchair.

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What's red and has zippers? Nothing, because watermelons can't physically drive without the help of a sheeps spinal cords ... DUH

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Nope.

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing???? she had down syndrome

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: It didn't, instead it got put in to a McDonald's chicken wrap. Life is funny sometimes, and sceane

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than Nickelback? Nothing. -Win G.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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How do you know when a Captcha defect causes you to post the same anti-joke three times? Canteloupe.

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Why was the boy sad? Because his dad was a serious alcoholic who refused to go to rehab. Being an alcoholic constantly led to him beating the boy and his mother. Eventually, the boy couldn't handle this anymore, and he committed suicide. Realizing what he had done, the father also committed suicide. The mother is now locked away in a mental hospital, for she couldn't hold grasp of the deaths of her husband, and her son.

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How many calories are in a bag of Fritos? 160 calories.

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Two black males walk into the bar due to circumstances they had to go home early one of them has to leave early to tend to his ill wife, and the other enjoys his night drinking and making small talk with new friends

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What happens when a leprechaun refuses to give you his pot of gold? He doesn't give you his gold.

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How do you kill a blonde? Pull the pin and throw it back...then proceed to paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops