On the next line im going to write a joke: George W. Bush

thumb_up thumb_down -13

NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats white and rubs stuff out ? An albino with a rubber.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Guy 1: Where's your dog Guy 2: I Dunno Guy 1: I ate it

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: What did the gun say to the person. A: Bang.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I told him to. I'm very influential.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: What did a rock say to a Another Rock? A: Don't take things for Granite!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did suzie fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not suzie!!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Who do you call when there is a ghost in your house? You should problably call the doctor, you may be hallucinating.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man walks into a bar And compliments the bartender for his great service

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why did the boy cry because i punched him so hard in the face he shit out his teeth for the next three weeks

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Factors that can increase your risk of prostate cancer include: Older age Being black Family history of prostate cancer Obesity My friend's grandfather is black and obese, his 70th birthday is tomorrow and his dad died of prostate cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why cant your mom breathe She chockin on my D**K

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's the best way to make people notice you? Begin a cult that follows some crazy religious division and go on mass murdering sprees, looting, murdering, and raping everything that moves. Your prime targets should be schools, orphanages, and hospitals (maternity wards for bonus points). Eventually, walk up to the FBI unarmed and have them capture you. Then demand that you get interviewed, as you have instructed your followers that if you don't get to speak on public television, they will bomb multiple major cities. When they put you on TV, simply stare at the camera and say: "Senpai. The time has finally come for you to notice me." Then, because you are a cruel, heartless bastard with no morals whatsoever, have your men bomb the major cities anyway. Have fun!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What happened at the 21 year old's birthday? She tried alcohol for the first time. She partied. She danced, She's dead. Open case.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why couldnt the polish people live in the outhouse? because the mexicans in the basement were too noisy

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why doesnt snow like Asians? Snow is a form of precipitation within the Earth's atmosphere in the form of crystalline water ice, consisting of a multitude of snowflakes that fall from clouds. Since snow is composed of small ice particles, it is a granular material. It has an open and therefore soft structure, unless packed by external pressure. Snowflakes come in a variety of sizes and shapes. Types which fall in the form of a ball due to melting and refreezing, rather than a flake, are known as graupel, ice pellets or snow grains. Therefore since snow is unhuman they are then thus incapable of emotions because they lack any vitals organs.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Hey, I just met you And this is crazy This song doesn't rhyme PENIS

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Chickens live on farms.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do you get when you drink water? Piss.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the black man cry and scream? It's anybody's guess. He was having a rough day.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

The black man at the narcotics anonymous meeting said, "oh, this isn't bingo is it?" then walked out of the room feeling mildly embarassed.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you make something disappear from your hand? Throw it somewhere that's out of sight,

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops