A very nervous looking black man walks into a bar full of white people, however, the white people are accepting of all races, so they invite him to sit next to them.

A guy decides to bring his new blonde girlfriend to a football game. After the game is over, he asks her if she liked the game. She replies: "Oh it was great, I loved watching those men in tight clothes, but there is one thing I don't understand." "What did you not understand?" And the blonde says: "Well, at the begginning of the game, both teams flipped a quarter to see who would kick off first. Then the rest of the game everybody was yelling get the quarter back, get the quarter back, get the quarter back. So I thought to myself, gosh it's just a quarter!"

A woman is hit by a car. Thankfully she manages to survive, but the driver is fined a lot of money for speeding.

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

yo mama so old that back in her school she didnt have history class

How many Mexicans does it take to cross the border? Don't answer, just think and laugh.

Why did the TV not turn off? You need to use a remote.

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm colorblind.

woman's rights

How do you make a twelve year old girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear.

Why did the Chicken Cross the Road? The Light was red.

A janitor walks into a bar. He cleans the bar.

What did modern scientists say to Einstein? Neurtinos travel faster than the speed of light! :)

Why was Carlos fired? Because he stole and smelled of weed.

An English Grammar Expert writes a very intelligent essay.

Q. Why did the car break dance? A. I dont know!

What did the cat say to the dog? Meow

Why did the creeper not go home? Because his parents blew up. (As told by a 7 year old.)

Who paved the road? The fat guy with the steam roller

What happened to the guy that got shot? He fell down

What do you call a person in a morgue? Dead.

Q. Why did the 8 year girl scream and cry when she was raped? A. I have no idea either. I drugged her and taped her mouth closed.

Why didn't Little Timmy's parrot talk? It's neck had snapped.

what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? a new bike.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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