Did you ever notice that if you blow in a dogs face it goes mad, yet when you take him on a car ride he sticks his head straight out the window?

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Why did the teenager turn in his work on time? He chose not to procrastinate.

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How many people buried in a cemetery are dead? All of them.

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What did Hitler get his son for Christmas? An Ez-bake oven and a GI Jew

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diarrhea.

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How do you make asian ice cream you mix it with a textbook

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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You can teach a man to fish but you cant teach a fish to man

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A Fat person walks out of mcDonalds

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how many Amish men does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one, but the likelihood of an Amish man needing to change a lightbulb is very slim.

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You are so ugly that for Halloween you had to trick or treat by phone.

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what do you call a baby with no arms and no legs in a mailbox? a horriffic murder

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-What's long, hard and full of semen? -Since this is a play on words both an erect penis and a naval submarine could apply here

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What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Hey bill

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What's worse than getting struck by lightning? Getting struck while your in your house!!

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What's the difference between a 7 year old boy and a 50 year old man? Hair.

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What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, his mouth was full of it's intestines.

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Fun Fact: If humans stood in a single file line around the equator, most of them would drown.

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What's the worst part about anti jokes? They get boring after a while

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What's the difference between a brick and a baby? One is a fundamental item used in building walls and the other is a human

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Q. Why is Obama stupid? A. That's an opinion, therefore i cannot answer that.

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass

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what's better than winning the special olympics?.. Not being retarded

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My dog has no nose, how does it smell? Using its anus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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