Why didn't the girl's ring fit? She had no fingers.

What song does a bulimic person sing while on the toilet? Nothing Bulimic people don't poop.

What's brown and sticky? ...A stick.

Knock knock. Why are you saying that, you should actually knock the door. Oh ok.

An Asian, white, and a black man decide to play Russian Roulette. The Asian goes first and shoots himself in the head. The white man picks up the gun for his turn. The black man runs down the street screaming. Cops see him and the white man holding the gun, both are sent to jail for life for the murder of their friend.

why are jews so cash hungry? because like the rest of us they are looking for a way to survive and feed their family.

You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

A black man, a jew and a muslim walk into a bar. ... I forgot what happens next, so let's just say they have a good time and get back home safely.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Shark bait.

God is like semen. They're both nouns.

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

What's the difference between a black guy and a bench? A black guy is a living, breathing human being, and a bench is an inanimate object

Whats the difference between a white man and a black man? black people have more melanin in their skin causing it to pigment and turn black

Q: What did the train say when it sneezed twice? A: Trains are inanimate objects, thus they cannot sneeze or talk. Are you an idiot?

Your mother is so ugly it affects her self esteem.

Hey man. what? squidbillies.

Knock Knock Who did that?

Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9 8 7

Q. How did the blind man cross the road A. By an abmulance which took him to the hospital because his first attempt to cross was unsuccessful and the hospital was conventeintly located on the other side of the road.

What did the girl call the boy? ugly. they hated eachother.

Why are apples cheaper than lemons? Because you have to pay less money then lemons to buy them

Why did Sally drop her Ice Cream Cone? Because her dog licked her butthole.

A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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