Mr. Krabs lives in bikini bottom (pinch pinch)

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A man runs into a bar, sits down in a hurry and demands a beer from the bartender. The bartender looks at him wearily, but shrugs, pours him a beer and sets it down in front of him. The fat naked man then drinks the beer and leaves.

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An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar... However, it's really busy, so they leave and go to a different bar.

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You know what assuming leads to... .....Assumptions.

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What did batman say to robin before getting into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile robin.

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A dog walks into a club. Just kidding I hit the dog with a club multiple times, killed it, and went to jail for the murder of an innocent animal.

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What is big, red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater

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Are you gay. No. Ok.

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OIO

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a. johns friend said your a towel b. rick replied im obivously not a towel and walked away in discust at his friends stupidity.

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What did the clown say when his car broke down? Sh*t!

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie roll pop? It would have to take a reasonable amount of licks for enough enzymes in the saliva to breakdown the hard candy part.

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Q. Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A. Because he has no arms.

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What can I say, besides, the media is fighting one another now, people do have more freedom, religion is losing the grip on people, and yeah the world may be a bit grim right now, but people have chosen their own direction in life, and that is going wherever the most corrupt ones in society tell them to. And that was never different, I am not saying that you are not doing a good job, I am saying that the underground society failed, we where idealists, then we where branded criminals, without a shred of proof, I have not lost myself, and you have not lost you, why save the rest from what they enjoy?

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2 + 2 = 4

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What happened to the boy who ate a piece of his Halloween candy? He died. It was laced with cyanide.

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A black man walks into a bar and he orders a margarita. The bartender says that the margaritas are exceptionally delicious in this bar. He was right.

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Why did little Billy not eat all his carrots? He does not care about his vision.

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Why did the chicken cross the street? K

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How did Darth Vader know what Luke Skywalker got for Christmas? He's his dad. He bought the presents.

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How many zombies can you kill at once? about one or two unless your Chuck Norris with unlimited powers.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are yellow Azeleas are pinkish purple

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What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

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what did the man with Alzheimer's say to his son? who are you!?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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