Why does the deer cross the road? It had just birthed two deer, one of which was hungry, and food was on the other side, the other had been hit by 4x4 Hemi V8 Supercharged F1-50.

Okay so there was a turtle, a pig, and a donkey. They were out fishing when suddenly they spot a man in boat. The man said he hasn't eaten in 5 days and he is very hungry. He looked at the turtle and said "no, too much shell." The turtle was happy and left. He looked at the pig and said "no, too much fat." The pig ran away and was very happy. He looked at the donkey and said "I think I'll have donkey today." The donkey ran away because he was scared. The man died from hunger.

What happens to the yellow hat when it is thrown into the red sea? It get's wet.

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house? A: That depends how hard you throw them... Q: Whats worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees...

What do you call a man with no arm or legs lying in front of a door? Idk, but how did he get there, and where is his aid to help him get out of this situation?

What killed Hitler? His gas bill.

What's green and has wheels? Weed. I lied about the wheels.

Fucked up quotes: "When walking trough hell, keep going!" (I just turn back and walk the other way thank you, I mean worst case I walk trough heaven right?" "Never give up, ever ever ever ever ever..." (Ill just end it with etc because I gave up something as hard as... Typing?) "Curiosity killed the cat" (Translated: "Curiosity kills, stay inside forever" What?)

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

Why did the little boy fall of his bicycle? It was the first time he road without his training wheels.

everyone dislike this

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

A bear walks into a bar, and says "I'd like a gin... and tonic." The bartender says "AAAAHHH! A BEAR!!!" and calls animal control. Later after the beast has been tranquilized and carted away, he rationalizes having heard the bear speak as trauma-induced hallucination.

My grandma told me to always keep my head up and just keep going. She fell down a manhole last week and died.

a group of mormons walk into a bar... just kidding mormons aren't aloud to drink.

Do you know why I'm bored???? No why are you bored Because I am

I had 99 problems Solved them all

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This joke is stupid, Chuck Testa.

Why don't Vikings read the New York Times? Because they all died centuries ago. And none of them live in New York.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I workout, Don't mess with me.

Knock knock! Who's there? ADHD ADHD wh-? SQUIRREL!

A cat starts grooming itself How many sprinkles does it take to cover the moon Cabinet because whales live in water

It's okay, I got the yogurt.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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