Patrick: My name is 24. Spongebob: Hey, Patrick, you know whats worse than 24? Patrick: What? Spongebob: 911.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Jewish people!

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Knock knock. I have a doorbell...

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hohifooncuiohicvsdhn ioshd

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Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought that the second one would have seen it.

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What's the difference between a plum and a rabbit? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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How do you make a sausage roll? Wrap some sausage meat in a pastry dough made of plain flour, water, salt and fat, and bake it in an oven.

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Q: why are anti-jokes tasteless? A: because they have no flavoure

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Q: why are black people good at basketball A: god you racist bastard

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face. The horse replies, neigh.

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Why did Timmy fall off his swing? The Holocaust

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69

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What do you call cheese that isn't your's Well it would depend on what type of cheese it actually is

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Tim likes girls

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Its Eliza, hope you are still there, would you mind getting here sooner? This site is not safe, besides its cold here, I mean send somebody else if you got to, I might look frail but Nero taught me a thing or two, so I can honestly say that Nero taught me better than you guys just in case. Funny you say there is no code, yet add three, yeah you better expect nothing "fancy", Mr.Torture dungeon master. Honestly though I do not blame you, and if I really meant you where a psycho, I would not have agreed/asked you showed up, I am serious I need to get out of here.

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Why was the black man eating fried chicken and watermelon? He was at home

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Two fish are in a tank. The first one says, "How the heck do I drive this thing!".

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Holy mother moley! Britain just brexited! Now there's no more Britain. Britain is all gone.

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What do you call it when you have sex with a black man? Sex

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A bear and a furry bunny rabbit were in the woods. The bear ate the rabbit..

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Why couldn't he play piano? Because he is an untalented piece of shit.

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can the real slim shady please stand up? no. there is a slim shady in all of us, so we will all stand up.

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Why wasn't Abraham Lincoln a good president? Because he got shot in the head and died.

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Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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