How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

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how do u wake up lady gaga? poke her face

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mommy mommy! why are we pushing the car over the cliff?! the mom answers shhh youll wake your father...

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A gay man watches football.

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What do the Wii, PS3, and Xbox 360 all have in common? None of them will get you laid.

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steven hawking walks into a bar

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why was the little boy crying? he wasnt, he died 2 weeks ago

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if a dog won't bark, there's no way you can teach it to talk.

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whats funnier than a black person dieing nothing that is so cruel

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? Go ask your mom.

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Why did the pig cross the ocean? So he could be eaten by Americans.

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A depressed man walks into a bar. He has a drink and heads back to his apartment. On the way he was killed by another man attempting to commit suicide due to depression.

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Two birds were sitting on a perch, one turned and said to the other, "Do you smell fish?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

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What word starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? Fuck.

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Roses are red Violets are blue some poems rhyme this one doesn't

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Okay, seriously I'm done. I try to make a joke but I don't think I can do it anymore. I'm not funny I'm just a little coward who offers nothing to life. I should just kill myself. Fuck this joke, fuck you.

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Q.) How do you make a whore blush? A.) Tell her she has pretty eyes.

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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Why was everyone afraid of Nick Morton? Because he had AIDS

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? How would she know? shes blind, deaf and mute; and incapable of knowing what she received.

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How many fingers am i holding up? none, my hand got blown off in Vietnam

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Mahjdichdhsjxidjhsbxu shcowiqx own hdqu Hedgehog the third

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A black man walks into a bar He looks at the menu and realizes he's in a bar, so he leaves

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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