A priest and a police officer are sitting at a bar. They both have considerable drinking problems because problems unrelated to their respective occupations. The bartender's name is Mike.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He has to on his commute to work. He is a taxpaying citizen who does his 8-5 job to try and cut out a decent living for his wife and kids, so stop questioning the route that he takes to get to work.

Did you hear phonsi was Gay? I just found out too, he walked into the diner and said, "ive got AAIIIIIDS."

Why did Jimmy get off of the park bench? he wanted candy from the man in the white van

a guy went to a bar and ordered a molotov cocktail. he died.

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothin. You already told her twice.

How do you find the richest man in Mexico? Go through government records and tax files and find the person with the highest salary

Yo mama so old, she might die soon

What did Robin say to Justin Beiber? You're gay. Angus L.

What kind of key can unlock a banana? Basically any key that is sharp enough.

Kid One: "Hey, you! Do you know how to spell "I CUP'?" Kid Two: " Sure, F-A-G....G-O-T..." Kid One: ".........."

What do you give a sick bird? Tweetment.

Did you hear about the 2 car crash in a walmart parking lot? 50 mexicans died

A homeless man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What will it be?" The homeless man says, "Nothing. I have no money."

Man 1: Did you hear that one about that girl who killed herself? Man 2: No Man 3: Yeah, neither did I

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't, he died like everyone else.

Obama

What did Santa Claus say to the young boy on Christmas Day? Santa Claus is a myth, that was actually a pedophile.

Like does not mean said. You can blame Justin Bieber for that one, cuz he was like "Baby Baby Baby" and I was like "no"

What's awesome about going to a no-pants party? Getting stabbed 2 times.

A blonde keeps walking down her driveway to her mailbox.Finally, her neighbor asks, "Why?" The blonde replies, "The computer says I've got mail."

Yo mamma is so old that she lives in a retirement home for the aged, and will most likely die there in several years.

What did the man say when he found out he had cancer? Nothing. He was so in shock, that he later died from another type of cancer.

everyone dislike this

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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