A pregnant woman walked into a bar what did she say? Can i have a drink

Why is the earth round? Because God saw it was flat and thought "too flat lets turn it around" And all was good.

I think I am done here friend, it always comes to this, it has always been easier for me to repair whatever is wrong with others and get my kicks out of that, as I know I can and will repair everything wrong with myself, but its hard as hell, I mean I never give up, ever. But that does not change the fact that I am broken, and that simply deciding that I am not, is far from enough, its a choice indeed, but its like deciding to constantly walk trough hell, and sometimes that hell is also called living, that too is always a choice, And believe me, I would never quit, I guess that if this hell I struggle trough has so many nice things in it, it just feels like hell at times. I mean the main motivation behind my ability to help others, has always been searching for answers low and high, and when what I have learned trough life helps others, but barely scratches the surface of the armor I am confined within, I lose hope, do you believe that my desire to help humanity grow, derived from my own incompetence at curing myself?

John's life hasn't been the same since committing suicide 13 years ago.

yo momma's so dumb she attended a dyslexic test and was proven mildly autistic.

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

Whats Big, Brown, and smells like Horse Crap? Horse Crap

Knock knock, Who's there? The constable. Your husband was killed in a car crash.

Q: Why was the black guy afraid of the chainsaw A: It was cutting his arm off

Knock knock! Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? To get to the other side!

What do you do with a baby with a broken jaw? Deepthroat.

What did the three year old say when he dropped his milk? Shitting buggery!

What is red and fluffy?... Your teddy bear covered in blood...

What is the biggest lie in the world? I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

YOU: Whats the difference between a white guy and a black guy swimming in a pool? Nothing except one has melenan in their skin

who's getting there balls chopped off by lilly? Nemo

A man walks into a bar... He has a severe drinking problem, and his wife weeps for him

What do vampires cross the sea in?

Whats long,hard, and has c.u.m in ig? Cucumber....also my wiener

whats 2+2 equal? 4

Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name ia not Mark.

What did the man who was having Deja Vu post on this website? What did the man who was having Deja Vu post on this website? What did the man who was having Deja Vu post on this website?

Where did Wendy decide to work for her part time job? TACO BELL

What's faster than the speed of light? Not a car

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...