What did the apple say to the other apple? Nothing, apples are fruits and cannot talk

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Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he saw his ex-girlfriend walking down the street so he was trying to kill her by hitting her in the head with the clock.

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There was 3 Men. Who had crashed their car on there way back from the Bar, All 3 of them died. Once they got to heaven, Jesus told him " The better in life you were with relationships,and staying true with one love- The better Transportation you get." Guy one got a Scooter. Guy two got a bike. And Guy 3 got a Mustang. One day, Guy 1 and 2 were on their bike and scooter. And they see Guy 3 upset. "Whats wrong? You got the best transporation in heaven!!" Guy 3 looks up at guy 1 and 2, Then says " I know I do..... But, I just seen my wife on a Skateboard."

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Q:What did the frog say to the mailman? A:Nothing theres no mail on Sunday's.

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A Jewish man and a blonde were in a DIY store, the man buys a box of screws. The woman gets a phone call to find out her son is late for tennis training. She then hangs up the phone and leaves the DIY store with great hast.

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what did the doctor say to the wery fat man? you have diabetes

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Question: So, what do you get if you put a live dog, a dead cat, some sugarcubes, and your sisters panties (HORMONES OKAY? EVERYBODY KNOWS HORMONES EQUALS SPICE! Or something anyways...) In a blender until its all red and squishy? The hell I know, but put some Redbull in it, and its fucking delicious!

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whats worst than finding a worm in your apple???? an apple in your worm.

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I was gonna clean my room. But then my mom did it.

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I pushed my friend off the bed after losing to him in FIFA 2011. He died.

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Why was the man choking? He was eating to fast.

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why do black people like kool-aid? it's a tasty refreshment

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What did the man do with his cat? he threw it in the garbage because he didn't like it

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This is funny.

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kk

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Q: Why did the mom try to wake up a sleeping bag? A: Because it's morning and her kid is curled up inside fast asleep

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What do you do if you see a black man in your backyard with a bullet wound in his head? Take him to the hospital.

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Why did the girl cry? She got hit by a bus.

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Predators face looks like what? Pussy.

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What is the difference between a baby and a tree? Its not illegal to hit one with an axe

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Which is better; having a billion dollars or a trillion dollars? Trick Question, you aren't that rich.

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whats the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari. I don't have a ferrari in my garage

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Basically

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A: Knock Knock B: Who's there? A: The Police. We have a warrant for your arrest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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