Why didn't Michael Jackson celebrate his birthday? He's dead.

What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

Why the moron throw the clock out the window? Because he was a moron.

How do you have se with hellen keller? Very sweetly

2 guys shot up a morgue..... 13 bodies remain dead.

How do you knock a clown off a swing? Hit it with an axe multiple times.

Scientists have discovered that the state of your hunger can affect what you say. For example, whether you choose to say ‘I’m hungry,’ or, ‘I’m not hungry,’ is based upon how hungry you are.

Bob Saget

An Irishman, an Englishman, and a Scottishman walks into a bar. They had a good time.

Little Jack Horner sat in a corner, Dead.

I hope your not allergic to bees Because your about to be attacked by a live tiger.

The Oakland Raiders

So there is a blind man... and he walks past a fish market and takes a deep breath and says"Oh boy it sure does smell like fish out here".

roses are red violets are blue tis poem makes no sense so screw you

What did one banana say to the other banana? Answer: It didnt say anything because bananas are inanimate objects, so it isn't humanly possible for a banana to speak.

Harry to Voldemort: Your mother is so fat, her patronus is a cake!

There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

what happened to the man who walked into a bar he slipped from the bar of soap and died

Why can't Heller Keller drive? Because she was blind.

That awkward momment when there is no Candy in the Van... <3

Why didn't cancer cross the road? Because it was to busy taking my family.

Your mother is so dumb, that she had a very poor ACT composite score.

Why did the black man drop his weed Because he got shot

Why did the black man shoot the white guy? the white man was about to hurt the black mans family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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