Did you know Helen Keller had a playground in her backyard? Neither did she

thumb_up thumb_down +17

There is a very old lady at the bottom of a long flight of steep stairs with a large amount of groceries piled up in her hands. How did she make it to the top?? She walked.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the old lady talk to a tree? She had Alzheimer's and was going to die.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what's the easiest way to tell time? a clock

thumb_up thumb_down +17

two hippo's were in the lake. The water was up to their eyes. What did one hippo say to the other? I don't know why but i keep thinking it's tuesday.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How long does it take to paint a house with babies? It matters how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Yo mama is so fat when she went to the fat contest they said SORRY no pros alowed

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's your star sign? Cancer. Oh you're gonna die. AWKWARD.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q:Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? A: Because he got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she has no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why wouldn't Michael J. Fox make a good Sniper? Because he has no military experience.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "A door to door salesman. Are you unsatisfied with the way your dish soap handles your plates? Then I have the product for you!" "I'm not interested in your product, but thank you anyway." "No problem. On an off note, how did you hear me? I didn't speak very loudly when I said knock knock, and I didn't even bother to knock on the door or ring the doorbell." "I have really good hearing." "Oh, okay. And for future reference, maybe you should open the door when talking to a visitor. Then body language gets established and the conversation flows more nicely that way." "That's some good advice, and I'll take it. Thanks, salesman." "You're welcome. On to the next house."

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Lewis

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What is both blue and yellow at the same time? Green.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what happened to the man who is standing in the rain? he got wet

thumb_up thumb_down +17

I will slap myself once for every like this joke gets!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the man laugh? Because humans laugh when they hear a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the football player walk so funny? He went to Penn State!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Who won the championship last year? There was no championship

thumb_up thumb_down +17

- What would you say if you'll see a Mexican eating hamburger in fast-food restaurant? - Enjoy your meal.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How do you make a drug dealer cry? Just say no

thumb_up thumb_down +17

My dad said that if I post anymore jokes on this website, the will hit my head against the keyboaaskdnaji;nsd;asdnasd;

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the atheist start snoring in his sleep? He has a naturally small airway and fairly large tonsils.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops