why was the woman in the kitchen? because societal standards placed her in such a situation

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, This poem is getting old, I like cookies.

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How do you get the icing in the middle of a cupcake? Cupcake raper...Duh

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What do you get when you cross a 747 with a passenger train? A large colission with hundreds dead and injured.

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what do you get when you combine a vampire,werewolf,and whiny girlfriend ....... the worst show in the history of the earth

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Get out".

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What is the difference between a fridge? I'm sorry, I have a severe mental disability and telling jokes is not... F'tang F'tang Zoop Pong Wii!

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Alan: My Grandfather was in the SS and has a leather jacket made jews he killed. Me: Really? Alan: No, i'm korean. My grandfather wouldnt be allowed into the SS.

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What's worse than having a worm in your apple? 2012.

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How do you stop a lumberjack? You thrust a javelin through his lungs

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What's similar about a black person and a white person? They're both black, apart from the white person

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What's worse than failing an exam? Failing two exams.

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Why'd the kid stick ice up his nose? To keep his lunch cold.

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Q: why did suzie fall out of the swing? A: because she was a pinecone

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Why did Jimmy lay down? Because he was tired

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A man is hungry so he gets on his coat and shouts : "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!". His wife says not to because the police say the rapist 'Eggman' is out again. He says he will be very careful. On his way he hears 'They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggmen-" and the man shouts: "AND I AM THE WAlRUS, SO GET THE HECK OUTTA MY FACE OR I WILL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" The Eggman and the man found two more people from Liverpool and formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band broke up.

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Whats long, hard, and makes a girl excited? A penis.

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A man penetrates another man.

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how much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? 7

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What did one dead baby say to the other dead baby? Nothing, they are both dead.

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What do you call an African American witch doctor dressed in ceremonial robes flying a plane? A Pilot.

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What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? A: I'm sorry. I was raised in an abusive home and I never learned how to properly express my emotions. I'm going to seek professional counseling but in the meantime we should end our relationship for your safety.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? To visit the graves of his wife and only daughter who were killed in a car accident at the fault of a drunk driver many years prior.

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Why did the chicken change the projector reel? To get to the other slide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops