Why did the Smartie get fired from the M&M factory? For throwimg out all the W&Ws

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A Priest, a Rabbi and a Shaman walk into a bar. The Bartender looks at them and says "What is this a Joke?"

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Why did the man jump into the river? He wanted to go for a swim, but the pool was closed, so he swam in the river.

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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You are in an airplane, and you have 500 bricks. You throw one out the door. How many do you have? 499. What are the 3 steps to putting an elephant in a fridge? 1-open the door,2-put the elephant in,3-close the door. How do you put a giraffe in the fridge? You open the door, take the elephant out, put the giraffe in, and shut the door. The lion king is having a party for all the animals… which one didn't go? The giraffe, it's in the fridge. An old lady is trying to cross an alligator infested river. She makes it over. How? The alligators are at the party. She dies anyway. How? She gets hit by the brick you threw out of the window.

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What's red and looks like blue paper? Red paper

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What is worse than a badly told joke? A badly told Anti-joke.

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Don't count your eggs before you put them in a basket.

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Why cant Stevie Wonder read? Because he is blind

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What is blue and angry? Mr Johnston wearing his green dress. I'm colour blind but he came round to my way of thinking in the end.

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What's awesome and rides a unicycle? Rollercoasters. I lied about the unicycle.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't become rotisserie with a side of hash brown.

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Q: why does the man like men? A: because he is gay

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what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

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What's brown, black, and red all over? The burning cross on the lawn of a respectable African-American family.

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Why didn't the parachute open? nevermind

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Q: Why did Suzie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock-knock? Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Q: What does one man with alzheimer's say to the other man with alzheimer's. A: Purple, because magic doesn't go through chickens.

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Stop screaming! The damn uppercase letters make my head hurt! Let a lady have it for once!

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i cant STAND cripple jokes

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how many cucumbers dos it take to change a light bulb? none. cucumbers cant change light bulbs. dumbass.

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What do you call a rabbit with carrots in its ears? Anything, it can't hear you!

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Q: What's the difference between a bird and a fly? A: A bird can fly, but a fly can't bird.

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What's worse than sitting through a boring class? Sitting on a bus that a terrorist is about to blow up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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