HAHAH MY WORD IS HAPPY CLAPPY

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A paraplegic walks into a bar.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reality TV.

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Why do dogs walk across the street? Cause they can

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar

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A Jew walks into a wall with a boner. He breaks his nose.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a pedophile.

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What's red and smells like cherries. Cherries

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Why are a black man's eyes always bloodshot red after having sex? Pepper spray.

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Why did the women die? Because She was a Squirrel.

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why did the skeleton cross the road ? because it wanted too. lolz

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What do you call a black man backfilping off a roof The dark knight

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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did you hear about the guy who got his left leg and left arm cut off? he suffered severe blood loss and is most likely dead.

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Me and my family won courtside tickets to the World Finals basketball game! ...WNBA...

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13

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What's the best thing about the Pixies? Their music.

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How do you make a person cross the road? Ask them nicely.

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What's as red as a Lobster? A Lobster

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road A. Because he needed to get to the other side

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Listen, I do not really care anymore, I admit it, I dont mind screwing with people, but if your name is Tifa, my name is lets see... Solid Snake, yeah, but call me big boss. Listen, be honest with me, if you do not trust me, just do not give me a random name, Tifa as in Tifa Lockheart? Final Fantasy? Wake up, girl/guy, you are losing your touch at this.

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Matrix if it had been with (as planned at some stage) with Will Smith. Normal Neo: Yes trinity lets find the others. Smith Neo: Yo pretty lady, lets go find them ho`s and chicken and stuff, then we can like go surfin and driving nuts and all that crackin stuff and then we etc etc. Normal Neo:... Smith Neo: You tellin ME this is your world Smith? Im Anderson yo and the one, Im gonna bitchmack you all and then just whoop you all with my master blaster no kidding buddy I have yellow belt Kung fu yo! Neo: We have to do something. Smith Neo; Yo unless we make a real rap video first we cant do the proper stuff you, why is this place all so green, get some colaaas! Seriously first we get carlton and then he dances his crazy dance while I go boyAAAAAAAAAAAAAAZ with my rap ok?

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What's slow and spotted? A cheetah, I lied about the slow part

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An old white lady falls on the ground in the middle of the night. Just then, two positively huge black men in hoodies walk up to her and she is frightened. But as it turned out, they just wanted to help her get on her feet, and called a taxi for her. When she had no money, they gladly paid her fare. This is because they're good people and not muggers

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops