If 1+1=2, then you must have passed first grade arithmetic.

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An man walks into a bar and then proceeds to purchase an alcoholic drink.

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The word you are looking for is charm, not seduction, I am above such things, and while I have no reason whatsoever to believe either one of us can gain anything from going "eye for an eye", I am sure I can offer whatever financial and even specialized assistance you might require in order to get that eye of yours seeing clearer than before... Worry not, I shall outlaw the name Nero and all the derivations and similarities from my Order, unless someone named Nero actually happens to come by of course...

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You are like really sincere aren't you? I really appreciate that in a friend. Thank you for being who you are Nero.

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What did one theoretical physicist say to another theoretical physicist? Hey there Bill, how's Nancy and the kids doing?

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How do you stop the neighbors from calling the police when you play your music too loud? Kill them and use their bodies as noise insulation

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What did one door say to the other door? Nothing, cause doors don't talk.

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hola said the chinese man

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Q: whats worse than finding a worm in your apple A: the holocaust

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How do you become a superhero? Eat 10 buckets of KFC.

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A gay man named pat played on a gay website with a child named Charlie

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Hey, does this smell like chloroform to you?

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Why would Jesse Ziegenbein and Terran Hansen make a good couple? Because they both smell like shit and are fat as hell

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Yo momma so fat she jumped up in the air and got stuck.

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What did the dwarf do after he sore a mole? Nothing. dwarfs are mythological creatures and therefore do not exist.

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How do you stop a dog from barking? Cut it's head off

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Why did the man walk instead of taking the bus? Because he felt like getting a heathy workout.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is both deaf and blind. Driving would be an extremely hazardous action for herself and other nearby drivers.

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Why did the boy wipeout on his bike? An old man threw a snake in front of his tire

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you put the chevy to the levy when your pants fell heave diarea

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You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

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A woman walked into a club. Or at least, that's what her abusive boyfriend told the police.

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Did you hear about the man hear about the man who lost an arm and a leg in a car accident? He's alright now.

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what did the robot say to the black guy? I'LL BE BACK

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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