Q: Why doesn't Micheal Jackson have orgasms? A: Because he's dead.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your landlord your being evicted we need you out in 2 weeks.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? It's Doctor Green. I've got some bad news about your test results. Can I come in?

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Why did the little girl cry? Because she had just witnessed the slaughter of her entire family and friends in front of her eye, leaving her not only peerless and alone, but also with the mental scars which come with witnessing such a harrowing ordeal.

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How many Jews can you fit in an ashtray? None, it would be ridiculous to even try to fit one in an ashtray.

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Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm not sure, but the farmer must be very upset about the loss of one of his chickens.

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Why did the Gay person fall down? He got shot.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead...

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What happened when an FBI agent and a cop argued over control of a hostage situation? Several people including a respected community leader were killed.

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What did the black man in a white van get when he went over the speed limit? A speeding ticket

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A paper cut is a tree's last revenge.

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why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

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Whats Better Than an Anti Joke? sex...

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Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: 7 is a registered sex offender.

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What did the blind, deaf, retarded kid get for Christmas? Spoiled.

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rabbits running in my bathroom!

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Why doesn't the man like iced tea? Because he likes it hot.

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Why are people so quiet at golf game? Because its such a boring sport.

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A ginger kid and his 5 friends walk into a bar

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A man walk into a bar he buys a few drinks. When he is done the bar tender gives him his check. Man told the bar tender he has no money to pay for it. Bartender says," ok how about this we have a horse in the back that hasn't laughed a day in his life if you can make him laugh you get the drinks for free." so man proceeds to do so. A few minutes later man comes out horse is dying. So the man gets his drink for free. A few days later man comes back with the same deal. So the bartender tells him" that horse hasn't stopped laughing since you went back there. If you can make him stop you get your drinks for free." Man goes in a few minutes later comes out horse is crying. Man man is remarked by how he did it but he doesn't question it. A few days past the man comes back an the horse is still crying...... So the bartender ask the man how he did..... Man says," first I told him I had a bigger dick then him....second time I proved it"

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A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

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knock knock

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Ask me if I'm a tree I don't need to, because I know you're not a tree

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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