What is the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One's fun to smash and the other is a watermelon.

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Why was the black man killed? He committed a serious crime and was issued the death penalty.

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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How did baby Bobby spend his summer vacation? He didn't, he died from heat exhaustion.

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Q: How many dead babies does it take to fill a mixing bowl? A: There is an infinite amount of answers to this question depending on the sizes and shapes or the dead babies, so lets assume that an average would probably be about 4 babies that dies just as the left the mother.

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Where is the best place to hold a bridal shower? The Kitchen

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There are two muffins in a oven, the first muffin is chocolate chip and the second muffin is blueberry.

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Is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Getting AIDS.

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A man walks into a bar in the morning. He is the bartender, and he works there.

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What do you call the black guy with a gun a ski mask on? Tyrone, because thats his name.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Conscience. Conscience who? Oh, sorry about that Hitler, you wouldn't know who I am.

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Why did little Sally throw a stick of butter out the window? Sally has a burning hatred for dairy products.

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Whats the difference between a Corvette and 1000 dead babies? I don't have a Corvette in my garage.

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What did Helen Keller say to her mother? Nothing coherent.

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What did Jimmy do on his 8th birthday? Turn 8.

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Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

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What happens to a banana after it gets sunburnt? It peels.

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What's worse than this That :(

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What do you call a black man helping an old woman cross the road? A concerned citizen.

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Why did it take so long to find Osama Bin Laden? No idea. Bad military tactics. Was he found?

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What does the hulk do when he's angry? Compulsively masturbate.

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what did the homeless person get for Cristmas? nothing.

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fun fact for the day: 100% of people that drink water die sooner or later

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knock knock!? . . No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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