Why did the mum scream at the boy? Because he was being stupid

How did young Austin get home while walking on the side of the street ? He didnt. He was hit by a car.

Your mother is so fat that she's more prone to cardiovascular disease than other people who stick to the proper BMI or body mass index

Knock knock Who's there? No one, you have no friends.

whats worse than being payton johnson being black

What did Rebecka black say on Thursday? Today is thursday.

Why is the black man in the ghetto? He is a cop and is trying to solve a murder that was committed a couple days ago.

How do you entertain a bored pharaoh? (written in 1600 BCE - Westcar Papyrus) -You sail a boatload of young women dressed only in fishing nets down the Nile and urge the pharaoh to go catch a fish

whats the difference between the same pair of shoes? one shoe is for the left an one if for the right

I found someone on the ground who wasn't breathing and had no pulse.They must have been in a damn deep sleep.

Q: What do you call men at sea? A: Sailors

Why did the black man get laid off? His company was no longer doing well and he was not needed.

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

What's worse than being arrested? Being arrested twice

yo Mama so stupid that she took a piece of paper and taped it on the t.v and called it paperview.

A baby seal walks into a club. :|

Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

What would Steve Jobs be doing if he were alive today? Dying.

Q: What's small, round, and looks like a marble? A: A marble.

Why did the bird lose all of it's feathers? It got cancer.

Knock knock. Man: Who's there? Hooker: The hooker you called for. Man: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. Wife: Honey, who is it? Man: The hooker I called for, but you haven't left yet. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes

Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

(you will only get this if you play minecraft) whats green and looks like a penis? a creeper!

What's green and has wheels? The farmer's tractor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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