What's better than your first Hanukkah? Not being a Jew.

what do you do when your girlfriend gives you head while playing MW3? continue to play while politely asking her sister to make you a sandwhich

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eyepatch? names.....

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to my house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

Why didn't the kid eat lunch at school? He wasn't hungry.

What did the raped girl say to the doctor? Nothing she was dead on arrival.

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

whats the differnce between a white boy and a black boy? skin color

Why did Hitler kill six million Jews? Why not? --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Texter 1: Hey, do you want to hang out? Texter 2: Sorry dude, i lost my phone, i'm trying to find it Texter 1: Ok, text me when you find it Texter 2: OK

Tiny timmy likes timmy turner in his time of tingling on christmas.

Chuck Norris is dead......

P1: why did the chicken cross the road? P2: to get to the other side. P1: Knock! Knock! P2: whos there? P1: THE CHICKEN!

a woman gets hit by a motorcycle whose fault was it?......... the man's, he shouldn't have driven the motorcycle in the kitchen

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

Whats the difference between a Dodo and an Elephant? They're both extinct. Excluding the elephant

*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

You are as dumb as a dumb looking person.

Why did the christmas tree smell like shit? because pavaroti used it as a dildo

how do u wake up lady gaga? poke her face

If an oak tree falls in the woods, and the tree has 3 squirrel nest in them, then does a whale jizz in the ocean?

my wife out of the kitchen

Your mother is such a whore that she engages regularly in acts of consensual but unprotected sex with various gentlemen.

Q: What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? A: Where's my tractor?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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