trump and hillary are both stranded on an island, who survives? america

Did you hear the joke about the butter? No.

Why don't pineapples grow on pine trees? Because they're tropical.

Get some flipping new jokes people

A Muslim man walks away from a populated area leaving his briefcase behind. After a few minutes he returns because he forgot his briefcase.

Did you hear the one about the girl who had three nipples? Neither did I.

Why didn't the Irishman walk into the bar? Beacause he had killed himself the previous night as a result of his alcoholism.

How many lollipops does it take to shingle a dog? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

Why did the girl kill herself? she was depressed.

Why didn't my marriage work out? Because I married a tangerine.

What the difference between an apple and a pear One of them is red

What happen when Sarah made but her nose in other people's business? Her vagina got set on fire by cole and derrek shoved your head up his ass!

Q: why are black people good at basketball A: god you racist bastard

What do you call a Fat man? You call him by His name because that's the polite thing to do.

whatdumb and gay stewart price

What is green and red and is going super fast? A frog in a blender.

Do you know what's annoying? Steve

Simon says, "I'll give you a five second head start before I mow you down with my AK47."

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, didn't you read the sign on the front door? It says, "People with suits on will not be served." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

Why did the cow cross the road? Because he escaped the farm and didn't know what else to do.

Why was the black guy charged for murder? He killed his wife.

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

PS: Call me a monster, The Devil, a Psychopath, but know this... For those of you that decide to become my pray by not choosing the right side... ...I have far since surpassed any state of fear, of evil, of darkness that you can think off... What you call fear and suffer now, is but mere entertainment for me, and in not too long, you shall remember those deepest horrors which you carry, as the last pleasure you remembered. Moral: Stand by my side those of you which desire to become the children of darkness, and I shall show you pleasure and love, for those that reject pleasure and love, are, and shall moreso become those which we hunt for whichever deprived desire that lies in the soul, in the name of love and respect for their lack of desire for love of course, as no desire for love, is to embrace the eternal desire of fear, as your heavenly father used to say, "surrender to darkness and fear" It wont be a choice soon, its not as if you humans ever where in control of your fears and nightmares. Amen? That only means let it happen... I will make it so. SOLVE media: Down the rabbit hole, coincidence you say... If this world experiences "coincidences", IT IS BECAUSE I MAKE THEM HAPPEN ON PURPOSE.

women's rights

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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